Body Image and Postpartum

Man, oh man, I frequently like to say that being a mother is a scam (very jokingly). We go through so many changes; mentally, emotionally, hormonally, and most importantly, physically. It's kind of not fair, but definitely worth it.

With both pregnancies, I struggled a lot with my confidence and body image. I don't have that many pictures of me from the shoulders down. At my heaviest, which was with M, I was close to 300lbs, and I was so ashamed of that. I was ashamed that I let myself get that big and ashamed that I couldn't keep up with my toddler, O, without feeling short of breath or just overly tired. I was also a vape user so that contributed to a lot. That was the heaviest I've ever been and that was when my confidence was the lowest. I tried concealing how big I had gotten by wearing oversized shirts and sweatpants (which also happened to the only things I fit comfortably). It also started to affect my intimacy with my husband, which added on another layer of shame.

It wasn't until March of 2025 that I decided I needed to change. I was going through the worst postpartum depression and anxiety that I have ever experienced. On top of having intensive therapy and medication changes, I figured another way to get out my rage and unhappiness was to get to the gym. Which ended up being a positive and fulfilling form of therapy. I was out on maternity for 3 months due to postpartum depression and anxiety, and every day I was at the gym. I felt myself getting stronger mentally and physically and it felt amazing. I slowly felt my confidence coming back, the clothes still fit the same and the number on the cale didn't change; it led to me taking a break from the gym. Mentally, I was expecting rapid changes because I thought that going to the gym on top of dieting and being in a caloric deficit that the weight was supposed to come right off. It doesn't work that way.

Ladies, love your body. It did a fucking amazing thing which brought life into the world. I know it sucks the weight that we gain and all the other physical changes we see, but love your body. If I could go back to being freshly postpartum, I would tell myself to love my body and to give myself grace. We, as mothers, need to do that a lot more, we need to learn to give ourselves grace. My confidence level is still getting up there, but I'm also learning to be patient with myself. It's not going to happen over night, but it will happen. It's not realistic to expect a "snapback body," so don't even think about putting that type of pressure on yourself. Take it slow and take it easy, after all, you've just given birth and even months after giving birth, your body is still healing. I'll tell you this once more but love your body and give yourself grace. This is not a race, it's not a sprint, it's a marathon. Do what you can and enjoy what you do.

I'll post a link to a video that I found recently to help me get over me body-shaming myself; it'll be in Mama Resources. I love you all.

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